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When It Hurts Too Bad

"God's love never ceases. Never. Though we spurn him. Ignore him. Reject him. Despise him. Disobey him. He will not change. Our evil cannot diminish his love. Our goodness cannot increase it. Our faith does not earn it any more than our stupidity jeopardizes it. God doesn't love us less if we fail or more if we succeed. God's love never ceases." Max Lucado - Just Like Jesus

It's hard to imagine that kind of love. We live in a world where you are loved as long as people can tolerate you. Where love and affection can be turn to hatred and intolerance faster than lightning. It is heartbreaking how fast someone can turn against you. Truly frightening.

There is a story in 2 Samuel of sinful lust that turned to hatred. I am not going to recite the story to you, you can read it in chapter 13 if you care to, but the verse that made the most impact with me when I read the story was verse 15:

“Then Amnon hated her exceedingly, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her…”

Our feelings and emotions cause us so much trouble at times, so much pain. One might even ask, is it worth it?

C.S. Lewis once wrote, “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

This statement might be the understatement of the year.

Is it worth it? Of course. But to love is to be vulnerable.

Shortly after Wendell passed away I read something about grief. Actually, I read a lot of somethings about grief, but this one put it in a way I had not thought about before; “without love, we would not grieve.”

If there had been no love, there would be no grief.

According to Dr. Katherine Shear, the founding director for the Center for Complicated Grief at Columbia University, “Grief is the form love takes when someone we love dies.”

I would say grief is also the form love takes when a relationship dies. I don’t believe it has to be a physical death; I know from experience it can be the loss of a friendship or a close relationship. We grieve what we once had and now no longer do.

So, what’s next? Well, for me, it was knowing, truly believing, that God is in control. God is in control, nothing takes Him by surprise. God is in control, nothing takes Him by surprise and He loves me beyond measure.

Isaiah 66:13 “As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you…”

“…for I will turn their mourning into joy and will comfort them and give them joy for their sorrow.” Jeremiah 31:13

Is that not the most beautiful promise?

There is a song I like to sing called, Trading My Sorrows.

“I'm trading my sorrows

I'm trading my shame

I'm laying them down for the joy of the Lord

I'm trading my sickness

I'm trading my pain

I'm laying them down for the joy of the Lord

We say

Yes, Lord x2

Yes, yes, Lord

Yes, Lord x2

Yes, yes, Lord

Yes, Lord x2

Yes, yes, Lord


I am pressed but not crushed

Persecuted, not abandoned

Struck down but not destroyed

I am blessed beyond the curse

For His promise will endure

His joy's gonna be my strength

Though the sorrow may last for the night

His joy comes in the morning…”

Take your pain to Jesus. With his own lips Jesus spoke these words: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” Matthew 5:4

God's love never ceases. Never

“…His compassions fail not. They are new every morning…“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I hope in Him!” The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.” Lamentations 3:22-26 NKJV

That is how you make it through the grief. That is how you make it through the pain. Hope, and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

by Jeanette Stark – Wednesday, March 8, 2023

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